The passing of a loved one can be the most difficult thing any person CAN go through.
End of Life Doula Services
We all will experience death. Normalizing it can help us better cope with this inevitable part of life. A death doula can help normalize death by ensuring people and their families are prepared for the end.
What is a Doula?
A doula is a non-medical professional who is trained to provide emotional, physical, educational, and practical care to anyone, in any environment, who requests their care.
You may have heard of a birth doula, someone who assists a pregnant woman through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum periods. They may help a pregnant woman by being a support person during pregnancy, providing education, being an expert who can answer questions, and offer advice. They may help with creating a birth plan (a plan to help map out their goals and wishes for their delivery). After the delivery, they may continue to provide support to the new parents with respite care, ongoing education and provide guidance and support.
My Mission
The mission of By Your Side is to provide support to the dying and their loved ones to promote a peaceful ending. It is my mission to honor a person’s individual experiences, choices, and circumstances to provide them care and support that aligns with their goals and wishes.
My Philosophy
Everyone deserves to be in charge of how they live their lives, how they experience illness, how they grow old, and how they die. You should be at the center of your care at all times with complete and honest information available to you to make informed decisions that are best for you and your family.
Services Offered
Patient Advocacy
Working in health care for 30 years I have learned a lot about many common chronic illnesses and how they impact patients, our healthcare system and the challenges patients face in our complex system. I am comfortable speaking to health care providers. I can help you better understand how your health care providers are supporting your care and help you have meaningful conversations with your providers about care and end of life.
End of Life Planning
I can help you better understand your options for Advanced Care Directives so that you can put your wishes in a format that will be meaningful for you and your loved ones and also provide the necessary documentation for your health care providers. We can put plans in place for how you would like your remains handled and how you would like to be remembered and celebrated.
Companionship
It can be lonely to grow older. You may feel you are a burden to others and resist asking for help. I can be an additional support system in your circle to provide visitations and basic assistance with practical life needs like shopping, running errands, or simple conversations. This time spent together can allow your caregiver some respite care so that they get the much needed time to tend to their own needs.
Vigiling
When a person starts the dying process it may take days to weeks before death comes. Vigiling is when loved ones take turns sitting beside the dying person to keep watch over them as they transition out of their body. Vigiling can provide comfort but also practical support for dying person to ensure they are clean and safe. A doula is trained to be able to identify the physical signs of dying and prepare to “hold the space” for the dying person.
Holding the Space
Holding the space is when the environment of the dying is treated as a sacred space. There may be low lighting, soft music and visitors offering gentle touching and sharing loving thoughts and words. A doula can help to “hold this space” for the dying to allow the dying person to be honored for the difficult work that is being done transitioning out of their body.
Caregiver Respite
The caregiver can be worn down and need time to themselves to maintain a healthy schedule and attitude for the dying.